Lesson in Great Literature

Lola Flushpoole and I talked today to get ready for tomorrow's Sunday service. After taking care of business, she informed me that her cousin had cancer. Her cousin had learned of a new experimental cancer drug from reading about it in a most dependable piece of literature, the National Enquirer. "Just think, if she hadn't had the Enquirer right at her bedside, she'd never have known about this new drug and it's working really well for her. I recommend you subscribe to the National Enquirer." After being thus enlightened by Mrs. Flushpoole, I went out to my backyard to see if George, the yard man, had cut the grass out back like he had promised he would. He hadn't, but it had rained so I gave him the benefit of the doubt. Maybe he'll return today. The church secretary, Myra McDonald, snorts when she mentions George and says he has a low IQ. Maybe, maybe not. I notice that every time he cuts the yard and I come out to inspect it, he's there waiting to get paid. He just appears. His timing is amazing. Does he cut the yard and then hide in the bushes to wait? Or is he up a tree somewhere?

I followed up with Lola Flushpoole about her suggestion that I subscribe to the National Enquirer. Did she recommend that I also subscribe to the Examiner? She looked shocked. "Heavens no. Don't subscribe to the Examiner. That's a piece of trash and it's full of lies."