Next door to the Smalltown church we have a cat breeding factory. It is self-sustaining, self-perpetuating, and self-multiplying. Most of the church members have counted cats at one time or another and the record so far is 21 felines. Rumor has it the house of cats is also a house of drugs. That theory is supported by the appearance of the house with all of its boarded-up windows. The residents boarded them up before Hurricane Ike and never removed them. A woman emerges once or twice a day to scatter an acre of cat food on the concrete slab in their back yard that borders the church parking lot.
I have an idea for what to do with the cats. Have some folks pull up in a vehicle while the cats are dining on their Kat Kibbles. The people sit a minute so the cats, if they are hiding, come out again. Then we throw an enormous net over all the cats and trap them. We then proceed to spray-paint them black. On Halloween, when we do "Trunk or Treat" and hand out candy from our cars in the parking lot, every child gets a free black cat to take home.
John Barge is skeptical. He says the idea is too far out and won't work and have you ever tried herding cats? Still, nobody has come up with a better plan and so far Animal Control has been hopeless.
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1 comment:
Gosh, ya mean all these years folks have been talking about "spraying" cats. I thought they meant something else entirely. Oh well.
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